What do the British think an American Pie is? (And a vegan pie)
Hint: It does not relate to the very old cliche, "American as apple pie"
Here is someone's very very cursed "American Pie" it's banana cream, and has a flag in it.
This week on Bad Food Pics Weekly I answer the pressing question in the subject line... and I finally really earn my title, boy howdy, these food pics are BAD! (I do this thing where I hold plates in front of my kitchen window because that's the only place with good light, so a lot of my food pictures have window screen as the backdrop) On to the pie!
There is a new season of Great British Bake Off on PBS (thank you PBS!) and aside from it being, naturally, incredible, there is an episode where the final challenge for our intrepid British bakers is to make... "American Pie."
According to the brits an "American pie" is as follows:
Has no upper crust
Too sweet
Some sort of same-consistency filling (think sweet potato, pumpkin, banana pudding, or key lime... notably, not apple hello England, there's a whole song about it.)
Honestly, I feel like turnabout is fair play. From watching pretty much every episode of Bake Off twice, I can say for certain that a British pie can be summed up equally neatly.
According to me, the critical components of a British pie are:
It is wet
???
It contains fruit, that is wet
It has an upper crust that is too fancy
Anyway, to show the British whats what, and to justify winning the American Revolution (because our system of government sure doesn't) I have decided to go all in on my own "American pie."
I am inspired for this recipe by the key lime pie that one contestant made for the judges that, no offense to Ryan, seemed to be... a key lime pie with a bit of ginger. The judges were shocked! They could not believe how good this pie was. I think the primary problem here is that they have not eaten enough key lime pies in their lives, and they have this (twisted and wrong) idea that they are 1. too sweet and 2. bad.
Gazing upon this pie you might notice a few things. This pie is not in the proper crust! Also it has meringue and not whipped cream on the top!!!!! This is insanity! Anyway, beyond that it is just like, a key lime pie. I think the british are just so used to TERRIBLE british desserts that the natural goodness of a key lime pie was legitimately stunning to them.
So, to commemorate this, to furnish an excuse to eat pie, and try my hand at a vegan key lime pie, I went ahead and made my own. I was going to take inspiration from the key lime pie in the episode, but honestly it was pretty cursed. It was a key lime pie in a shortcrust pastry, NOT IN A GRAHM CRACKER CRUST, that had meringue on top. Wrong! Bad! The only positive innovation was the inclusion of stem ginger, but it is literally not possible to buy stem ginger in stores in the US, and nobody even knows what it is. (It's wet ginger, basically, because the British loooove wet food, it's just like, an island full of people with the same taste as my cat).
I decided on a vegan version of this Classic American Pie because 1. I'm super lactose intolerant and haven't had access to key lime pies in years, and 2. I was asked back when I was a food blogger to write a recipe for a vegan key lime pie and at that time I said "sure totally" and then didn't follow through. I took this recipe straight from a real master of vegan cookery Isa Chandra Moscovitz, and it was the first time I cooked with agar agar!
This is my pie, as you can see, the color of it is... slightly repulsive. But the flavor is great! Just don't focus too much on how it is a beige pie.
I just want to be completely transparent—there are some really and truly cursed vegan pies out there. I was relieved to find that this recipe actually winds up completely smooth, and fully set. Agar agar works just as gelatin would, so while this does not have the egginess of a traditional key lime pie, it gets the texture exactly right. I was actually so into this recipe that I have started delving into a whole new world of agar agar thickened desserts. Agar Agar is sort of a cousin of jello, except not made from animals. Also, unlike jello, agar agar can set hot or cold. Think about the last time you saw a melting jello salad on a picnic table: agar agar will not do that to you. The downside of it is that it almost holds too well. This pie cuts almost alarmingly cleanly. It has none of the droop and natural ooze that you get with a custard. If you use too much agar agar you can wind up with something that is very firm and rubbery, however, this pie was not rubbery, and not too firm, in my opinion.
Key Lime Pie
Vegan grahm cracker crust:
1 1/2 cups finely ground grahm crackers
1/4 cup confectioners sugar
5-6 tablespoons melted vegan butter or melted coconut oil (I used a combination of both)
Mix all the stuff together, press it into a baking dish, making sure there are no gaps, because the filling will leak through, bake for 7 or so minutes at 375.
Just a note... my crust was... not great. Definitely the worst part of this pie. So don't make this crust. If you can buy one just buy it!!!! It is not worth it to make your own!
It looks kind of like this!
Pie filling from Isa Chandra Moscovitz
Makes one 9 inch pie
1 tablespoon finely grated lime zest (imo you could add a bit more than a tablespoon)
2/3 cups fresh lime juice
1 1/2 cups unsweetened almond or oat milk, at room temperature (I used oat milk and it was PERFECT, it's very neutral and has great body.)
2 tablespoons agar flakes (or two teaspoons agar powder and skip the soaking step)
1 16 oz can coconut milk (full fat) at room temperature
2 tablespoons tapioca flour (or try it with corn starch or arowroot – but I like tapioca best)
1/2 cup sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 9 inch prepared pie crust
Think of this as a process photo. These are... some of the ingredients you will need. I tried to get them all in the frame but I'm an awful photographer.
In a small sauce pan, soak the agar in oat milk (or almond) for about 15 minutes (don't heat it yet!).
In the meantime, mix together coconut milk, tapioca, sugar and vanilla. It’s really important that your coconut milk is at room temperature so that it doesn’t affect the agar when you add it to the pot.
After soaking agar, turn up the heat and bring to a boil. Keep a close eye so that it doesn’t boil over (I stopped looking and almost lost my whole mix, really keep an eye on it). Immediately reduce heat and let simmer for about 15 minutes, until agar is dissolved. If using powdered it will only take about 5 minutes to dissolve. *I recommend mixing it around a bit because it can form little crusties on the side. Also, take a whiff, (or don't) it smells very weird.*
This is what it should look like when it is dissolved. Also, notice the nasty brown color!
Once dissolved (you can check by dipping in a tablespoon and seeing if there are any agar flakes left), very slowly whisk in the coconut mixture and then the lime juice and zest. Adding it too fast will make the agar gel up, which you don’t want it to do just yet. Once added, whisk often for about 10 minutes, until mixture has thickened. If it isn’t thickening, turn the heat up just a bit, but you don’t want it to boil.
Pour into pie shell and let cool on the counter for about half an hour, just so that it isn’t steaming like mad. Refrigerate for at least 3 hours, until fully set. Garnish with lime slices. Serve with some vegan whipped cream
***
(For vegan whipped cream, I like the so delicious frozen stuff, it's great and you can refreeze it like, infinite times, you might be able to find it in the freezer aisle.)
It is worth noting: this pie does not have the same color as a non vegan key lime pie, because the actual color of a key lime pie comes, not from the limes, but from egg yolks. This pie is naturally a bit beige (mine was slightly brownish because oat milk is faintly brown) I added a bit of green food coloring—do not do this. I then added a bit of yellow food coloring, which also didn't really help much. If you use almond milk it will probably be less brown, but I find that almond milk can have a sort of pervasive flavor.
So here's two pictures of pie, both bad.
The unfortunate thing about this pie is that the color... sucks. I've seen a lot of vegan recipes that add a smidge of turmeric to things that normally are yellow due to eggs, but I didn't think about that, and also people always mention how it's "healthy" and I am offended by the idea of healthy pie.
That's all folks!
Do you have any great vegan desserts I should make? Anything that you've made with agar agar? I have a whole bag I need to use.
I wanted to keep it solely food focused this week, since last week I was uh, not really, also this has gotten super long. I just have so much to say about this pie!
Have you tried vegan pies? Do you want more or less vegan content?